French Dressing

This is one of those recipes that I didn’t realize had a bit of controversy lurking under the surface. Apparently there is a disagreement as to what “French” dressing actually is. In the UK, it’s a kind of vinaigrette, but not in Switzerland where it’s white and creamy, and here in the US, it’s supposedly a red ketchup based concoction that repulses the rest of the planet, and naturally, the French have never heard of any of this stuff and think it all tastes disgusting.

Myself, I’m partial to the sweeter “Catalina” French, but generally not a big fan of store bought dressings because they are either too expensive, or they don’t taste very good, or both. I also like my dressings to be thick enough to noticeably cling to the salad. So today’s recipe will be that gross American stuff that the rest of the world can grit their teeth over while they snobbishly munch on snails, balut, black pudding, tripe, haggis, pidan, surströmming, casu marzu, or whatever else crawled out of their sewers and onto their plates.

So first off, put the ketchup back in the fridge. I like ketchup a lot, and put it on more things than my father would approve of, but quite frankly there are notes in the ketchup that I just don’t like on my salad. Instead, we’re using tomato paste, sugar, vinegar, water, onion powder, and salt… Which would be a basic recipe for ketchup, but let’s just get on with this recipe already.

French Dressing

Ingredients:

1½ c. White Sugar
1⅓ c. cold Water
⅔ c. Oil (Canola/Vegetable/Salad)
⅔ c. Vinegar (white or cider)
6oz can of Tomato Paste
2 tsp Salt
2 tsp Onion Powder
1 tsp Black Pepper
¼ tsp Garlic Powder

Instructions:

Essentially, dump all the ingredients into a blender and get to blending. Scrape down the sides as needed, because tomato paste clumps to the sides. Continue to blend on high for 3 to 5 minutes so it can emulsify. This will fill two thoroughly washed out store bought bottles of salad dressing that didn’t taste nearly as good as this does. Chill in the fridge overnight. Dressing may thicken a little as it sets, but it should still be pretty easy to pour. Shake well before using.

This is officially the right way to make French dressing, so copy/paste this into your own recipe book.

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